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Objectification & Male Self-Esteem

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man objectifying womanWhy do men objectify women?

Jason Gavis asked men that question on his Facebook page and wrote about their replies for The Good Men Project. Here’s one answer he got:

For me it’s about seeking approval… the most fun and exciting and ego gratifying times in my life have been when I have embraced it and danced with it.

This reminded me of a woman who said (more like complained) that her guy seemed to get an ego-boost whenever a woman he ogled noticed him.

So I’m wondering why this is. 

Because it doesn’t always work out that way.

In fact, some men feel inferior to sex goddesses who make them feel weak in the knees. Some of these guys react by hating sexy women.

I wonder if a guy might try turning the tables by objectifying — remodeling said vixen into an object — in hopes of attaining the higher status of “subject,” himself?

But the quote above sounds like the guy is having fun, not compensating for an inferiority complex.

Robin Thicke objectifying women

Robin Thicke objectifying women

For guys like him, maybe the ego expands because he thinks the sex goddess is dressing up for him, and enjoying revealing herself to him. “She’s offering herself up to me… She wants to turn me on.” And therein, she lifts him slightly higher than herself — since she is doing it all for him.

I wonder because a guy once told me that that’s how it worked for him.

Might make sense in light of some studies.

Researchers found that men who spend more time gazing at women are more often risk-taking and sexually compulsive. Also, guys who seek out short-term hookups (the more sexually compulsive?) tend to overestimate women’s attraction to them. And the more attractive these guys find a woman, the more attractive they think she finds them.

So ogling could well give these guys a much desired shot in the arm.

On the other hand, maybe the sexy lady just makes these guys feel good. And feeling good, he feels better about himself.

If any guys would like to chime in, I’m curious to hear your thoughts. And keep in mind that “objectify” is not the same thing as “desire” or “appreciate an attractive person.” Men who objectify don’t see women as people whose thoughts and feelings matter. And objects don’t deserve autonomy and respect, either.

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